Joslyn is here!!

It's been an incredible two years since I wrote Jacob's birth story. And now, here we are again to remember Joslyn's. We are so grateful to God to be able to be parents again. And now that Joslyn is here, we realize it's an even greater blessing to be able to be HER parents. Here is her sweet story.

When we got pregnant with Joslyn, we were so excited to be able to plan for another home birth. Jacob's birth at home was so fulfilling and peaceful, that we knew we'd like to have Joslyn at home, as well. To be able to pick up right where I left off with my midwife, Christie, made me feel so secure and calm about the whole process all over again. 

At 38 weeks pregnant, I started labor. Justin and I were so excited and went out for date night to celebrate. When we got home, my contractions were gone. I was so disappointed. This start and stop of labor (called prodromal labor) happened 3 more times before my due date. It was an emotional roller coaster. Contractions were happening, but not getting stronger or keeping consistent.

On my due date, April 19th, I woke up having more contractions. I was convinced this wasn't any different than the other times. Our little family of three got ready for Sunday morning church, ate some breakfast, and went on with our day. By lunch time, I wondered..."maybe this is real?...but nah." I took a nap while Jacob did. By 5pm, I was more convinced that it could be real labor so I called Christie. She agreed to come by and keep us company. When her and our birth team arrived, I still didn't want to believe it. We didn't even tell anyone that labor had begun because I didn't want to get others' hopes up just in case. Christie checked me when they first arrived, and I dilated from a 4 to a 6 while she was checking. She remarked how incredible that was. I was pretty stoked, myself. This WAS real! I remember saying, "I'm so excited!!" in between contractions. Once labor started progressing more quickly, I was not as excited as I needed to focus much more on each contraction. 

Jacob was so thrilled to have everyone there. He was hyped and having a great time.

 He and Justin frosted Joslyn's birthday cupcakes that I had made that afternoon.

SPRINKLES.

 The birth team set up our home with all of the birth supplies. 

Justin and I worked through more contractions together. When he was needed to help Jacob, I remember feeling our midwives stepping in to help press on my hips, or lay a hand on my back. My eyes would be closed through a contraction, but I felt SO supported, SO loved. I was not alone. It was an amazing feeling to have these supportive people around me in the comfort of our home while I labored. There's nothing like it.

Jacob hugging on me through a contraction. I'm SO glad he was there.

I had planned to labor and birth in a birthing pool. We started to fill it and I got in, but Christie checked on my progress and mentioned that baby Joslyn was in a posterior presentation (sunny side up). We needed to get her turned in order to deliver more effectively. So we had to leave the pool behind, and move to my bedroom.

The pool was great for my back labor, even though we barely got to use it.

Justin was great support the whole time.

Our photographer said I mentioned here,
 "I'm so excited she's finally coming!!" after all of my stop and go labor.

They had me try lots of different birthing positions to turn our little girl. This part of the labor was incredibly exhausting and difficult for me. I felt contractions DEEP in my back, and had little relief from any counter pressure used by Justin or my midwife. One of our assistants used one of our woven wraps (used for babywearing) and had me get on my hands and knees. She wrapped it around my belly and shook it from side to side. This is called "sifting." That combined with the different positions we tried did the job in turning Joslyn to a better anterior position once again. She was so incredibly wiggly during this labor, it was hilarious. But she maintained a good heart rate every time Christie checked her with the doppler.

Checking Joslyn's heart rate with the doppler. I love this picture. :)
So privileged to have carried my babies and have these stretch marks.

Jacob was asleep for the night at this point, and that worked out well because I remember the next parts of my experience as very intense and the most difficult.  I spent a lot of this time on my hands and knees through contractions. 

I wrote some encouraging thoughts and scriptures and left them around the room. 

 I believe God gave me the strength I needed to get through the rest of labor. A bit more dilation needed to happen before Joslyn could come the rest of the way down. Christie said I could push if I felt the need. I tried, but didn't get very far. She had me get on my back and bring my knees to my chest.  Justin held my right knee and held my head up. I remember him putting a wet wash cloth on my head and kissing me. Such amazing support during the most difficult parts of my labor. I'm so thankful for him. Before I knew what was actually happening, I was pushing. In three giant pushes, Joslyn was born. My water broke as she came out and Christie helped me pull her onto my chest. It was incredibly fast. All I could say over and over was, "I'm so glad she's here! I'm so glad that's over." Haha. 

SO relieved and elated she was finally born.

Little Joslyn Claire

Hanging out with Daddy

Post Birth snack!

Justin and Carmen, another one of our awesome birth assistants, 
weighing Joslyn at 7 lbs. 1 oz. 

Hey sweet girl!

It was not as easy of a labor as Jacob's, that's for sure. But, I could not be happier with the experience. The freedom, fulfillment and comfort that it brought me to birth at home again was invaluable.

I cry when I think that Christie delivered both my babies here. We are forever thankful to her. Through both pregnancies and births, she brought me peace of mind and was serious about keeping us safe. But, she also helped us remember to trust the process and know that babies know how to grow and be born when all is going well.

Our midwife, Christie, and one of her adoring fans. :)

I'm thankful for what I've learned about birth while we've lived in Colorado Springs. There is a huge community here of birth professionals ready to give women the birth experiences they're looking for. I've learned so much from them on Facebook and in the mommy meetup groups I've joined. Our sweet friends and family have rallied around us to pray, bring meals, and offer other kinds of awesome support. We feel SO taken care of and are enjoying our sweet time as a family of four. Life is GOOD. Thank you God for how He blesses us immeasurably!!

(All photos courtesy of JCDC Photography.) 

Welcome to the world, Jacob!

This is the story of our son's birth. Thanks for taking the time to read through it and treasure it as much as we do! :)

The day before my due date, Justin and I thought it might be a good idea to spend time with good friends. I needed something to take my mind off the fact that although the calendar was “ready” for this baby to come, my body might not be. And who knew when our son would actually make his appearance. As we sat with friends talking and laughing, I noticed I started to get contractions. Nothing too painful, but definitely coming in pattern. We went home appreciating what a great evening it had been, but brushed off any kind of high hopes that labor might be starting.

At 1:00 am on April 8, 2013th (my due date), my body awoke with a wave in my back and lower abdomen. Again, I brushed it off, tried to breathe through it and fell back asleep. If this was indeed labor, my body would continue and I would definitely have to wake up with each one. Well…I did. Each one lasted about 30 seconds, and came seven to eight minutes apart. By morning, they were steadily arriving at seven minutes apart and 40 seconds long. Justin and I agreed it would be a good idea if he stayed home from work, and we geared up mentally for a long labor. I called our midwife, Christie, and let her know things were starting. Her great advice suggested we do something fun. This was the time to distract ourselves in spite of what was ahead. I finished cleaning up the house, made sure all of our birth supplies sat in proper order, and made our son’s Funfetti birthday cake for visitors to enjoy in the first few days.

Every five minutes, I was interrupted by contractions, still surging in my back and abdomen. Leaning over the kitchen countertop and back-and-forth pacing helped relieve the pain some. But I could tell they were getting steadily more intense.

 Justin and I went to Target around 1:00 pm to browse and buy some snacks for the long night ahead. I loved walking around the store, enjoying the excitement I felt. Every five minutes, I made my way into an aisle to breathe and rock my hips. I remember telling Justin, “People must think I look crazy.” But we were doing our job keeping busy, for sure!

Once we got home, we tried to take a nap. I couldn’t be still for more than 15 minutes, and realized it was too intense to lie down. I suggested Justin keep sleeping to be rested for later, and I went downstairs to continue breathing through each contraction. When he woke up at 4:00 pm, I needed him to stay with me. He offered the best support by pushing on my lower back during each contraction. Also, he told me how great I was doing. Much needed encouragement!

At 5:00 pm, I started thinking about how much I wanted Christie to be here. We called her and she offered to come over to start setting up for the birth. I knew things were progressing, because I felt such incredible relief to see her walk through our front door. After nine months of her invaluable support, she was here, and it was almost time to meet our baby.

She sat with me through a few contractions, and helped me to remember to relax. I vocalized loudly through each one, as they were getting to be the most difficult I had felt so far. I knew I wanted to get in the labor pool soon. But she asked to check my progress before doing so, in order to know how much further we had to labor. She looked up at me surprised, and told me how I was already 9.5 cm. She said, “we might have time to get the pool ready.” I was so thrilled, in spite of the intensity each contraction brought!  Who knew things would happen so quickly for me as a first time mom!

It was about 6:00 pm at this point, and she rushed to call her assistant, Carmen, and organize necessary supplies. Justin and I continued to work together to get me as comfortable as possible. I asked God for strength under my breath. He was with me.

They got the birthing pool ready, but the water was too hot…not a usual problem at home births. Things were progressing at a rapid pace. I started having the uncontrollable urge to push, so they helped me quickly into the tub. The water provided great relief. I started getting sleepy in between each contraction.

 Pushing was the most difficult part for me. I remember feeling quite out of control. It was painful, but Justin, Christie and Carmen encouraged me to push past it because it needed to happen for this sweet baby to come. Christie had me reach down and touch his head. He had so much hair!  (I had secretly wished the whole pregnancy that he would have lots of hair, as Justin and I had nearly none as newborns.) This was the perfect motivation I needed to give one last good push.

After only 26 minutes of pushing, and 16 ½ hours of total labor, I felt my son’s body slide out into the water behind me at 7:49pm. The best feeling I have EVER experienced. I turned around, Christie put him on my chest, and I looked at Justin in complete disbelief. All I could say through my tears was “oh my gosh, oh my gosh…” He was here, he was real, and I had a face to put to his name…Jacob Adam. He was more perfect than I could ever imagine.

He gave a faint cry. Christie and Carmen went into action to make sure he became more responsive. He had come so quickly, that he needed a bit of help to get going. I was amazed when Christie gave him a few breaths mouth-to-mouth. How thankful I felt that she would do that without hesitation. Justin and I stayed calm because we knew we were all in good hands. I prayed. I talked to Jacob and told him I loved him. He finally got more color in his body, and we knew everything was fine.

They helped me to the bed and got us cleaned up. I could care less about what they were doing around or to me. I couldn't stop looking at my sweet boy. They checked him, Justin weighed him, and I got to cut the cord. It was all so fun to witness and watch. 

Christie and Justin weighing Jacob

Justin laid down next to me and we stared at our baby together. What a surreal feeling to be relaxing comfortably in my own bed, together with my husband and son in OUR home. I don't feel like I did anything heroic. I really believe that anyone who wanted to choose home or natural birth could do it. The outcome is well worth the effort!

6 lbs 10 oz, 20 inches long. Pure sweetness!

When Christie and Carmen packed up and said goodbye to us in the living room, I didn’t know what to say at the end of such an event. I am so glad they were part of our story. “Thank you” still doesn’t feel adequate enough. Justin and I thank God for such a peaceful and safe experience. We knew we were blessed, but Jacob is no doubt the greatest blessing to us so far. 

...and only 3 weeks to go!

Couldn't sleep. I have been processing ALOT lately. So I thought I'd catch up with the old blogeroo.

The end is in sight! This is simply amazing to me, because I cannot remember what it's like to NOT be pregnant. 9 months is a long time! But, for good reason. All of your emotional, mental, and physical ducks have to get in a row. So, I am thankful to have had that time to process what a change this will be.

Justin and I are ready. Every day that passes allows me to move away from the denial I've been feeling and embrace the excitement of having a new little life in our lives. I suppose the change of lifestyle was truly daunting! But sweet friends around me have reminded me that the joys of motherhood outweigh the spit up, sleep deprivation, and spontaneity of a young married life. I'm grateful for their words of encouragement and Justin's willingness to listen to me when I've had my freak-out moments. :)

The nursery is done and functional. I meet with my midwife for the last time this week before I see her in labor. Everything is going well with my body and the baby. Even though I'm exhausted like crazy, am sick of eating (imagine that...) and have occasional hip pain, I still have nothing to complain about. I'm STOKED that this pregnancy went as well as it did. It's a blessing from the Lord!!! Our only prayer now is that our little   boy is healthy, and that we have a safe delivery. To see Justin become a daddy is probably my other most favorite part of all of this. What a team mate God gave me! And I'm super glad he will keep me laughing during labor.

Going to rest in the new excitement God gave me last night. Glad that He is my source of joy and that everything else is like really good cake icing. Mmmm, cake...

9 weeks to Parentdom...

Justin and I are in the home stretch. I finish work in 2 weeks. Friends have started fun preparations for our baby showers (SO BLESSED.) We have a lot more to do to get ready, but I would say we're in good shape. I don't know if I can say I'm in good shape, then again... I am nearly 8 months pregnant. I'm confident that my body is doing what it needs to in order to keep our little boy healthy, but it sure is unnerving when even T-shirts stop fitting. Already thanking God for the energy he will give me to get this baby weight off when the time is right! Very thankfully, I'm well within average weight gain limits. Can't wait to start training for my next half! Don't worry. My priorities are in order. :)

Justin and I have had lots of time together lately to realize how much things are about to change. We know good change is coming, but can't help but realize that it's HUGE change. That can be a bit overwhelming to me at times, but Justin is great about bringing me back to Earth. So thankful for an even-keeled husband that trusts in God and reminds me that I need to do the same. In the beginning of the pregnancy, 9 months seemed like FOREVER. But now I'm realizing how smart God was. He realized we would need this time to prepare, in every facet. Now with only 9 weeks to go, 9 months doesn't seem long at all!!!!

I'm starting to get "practice" contractions, and I'm getting VERY excited to see how my body will perform during labor. God made me for this. He will be with us. And He will be my strength and peace throughout it all. Justin and I have been taking birth classes, and I am already fascinated to see what an amazing coach Justin is. I think I picked well! ;) And having close friends around us that are in the same season of life is also beautiful. God always has support ready for us when we are in need. We are always taken care of.

Lots more to report soon, I'm sure. I'm looking forward to this year and my time as a stay-at-home-mommy. I have big plans to help bless my family and others. I'm already  realizing what a new time of ministry it is that I'm entering. That means my arsenal will consist of the Bible, pinterest, crafts and lots of cooking/baking ingredients! Justin is wonderful to provide for our family while I take care of our son. So I'm thrilled to help provide in other ways to return the favor. I'm overwhelmed with God's favor and blessings on our family.

16 weeks to go!

Today marks 24 weeks of pregnancy. Justin and I are looking at about 16 weeks until life really gets cray cray. We're enjoying every moment. Not stressing too much about getting everything done. I'll be done working in mid-February. And I'm sure that will give me enough time to make adjustments to the nursery, shopping, etc. It does seem to be going fairly quickly!

Latest news is that we're having a BOY!! Could not be more thrilled. We could have sworn it was a girl, so it was the ultimate awesome surprise to find out a little man was coming our way. He's given his mommy the easiest pregnancy ever, so I could not be more happy about that. And for all of those wondering if we have a name picked out...we're keeping his name a secret until his birthday! :)

I really love my job, so in a way I'll be sad to say goodbye. But it's been a great chapter and it's a great addition to my resume. Having special forces soldiers for students has been hilarious and a bit challenging (you can't write a tough guy's name on the board to give him a warning...). But, I've made great connections with other instructors and God knew it would be another piece in his giant puzzle of a plan for me. I feel blessed. And after taking some very important time to be a full-time wife and mommy, I know I will be in a classroom again one day.

Justin got a promotion a few weeks ago, and now has a permanent Systems Engineer position at ISS. He loves his job and coworkers. I feel thankful that he feels fulfilled and respected in a job he really likes. He feels pretty blessed, too.

Justin's mom, brother, and one of his sisters are coming to spend Christmas with us. We look forward to a fun time relaxing with everyone in our jammies. Showing them around Colorado Springs will be great fun too!

So here's to the time between now and April 8th (or somewhere around there, since only 4-5% of babies come on their due date). We can't wait to meet our little guy, and then introduce him to everyone else! The joy and support we feel with his arrival is exploding compared to the joy we felt on our wedding day! It's pretty spectacular to see how love multiplies. God is good!

15 weeks!

The pregnancy insomnia monster has struck. I've been sleeping so hard the last few months that this seems uncanny to me. Achy back, rumbly tummy, and mind spinning all make for a bad night's sleep.

My 15 week mark has hit. This is going by really fast and really slow at the same time. It's safe to say that I'm officially starting to show. Any pictures I've taken until now just looked like crazy bloat, so I won't be cataloguing those. I wish we would have been better about documenting weekly pictures, but from here on out I will...now that I have a 'goomba,' as Justin likes to call it.

It sure is an exciting time for Justin and me. Knowing these next 5 1/2 months (that's it??!!) are the last we'll have as just the two of us is CRAZY. Since I was 15, it's been just the two of us...in our adorable, lovesick little bubble. Crap be getting real! I look around, and seriously wonder where the time went. We're grown-ups, with a house and pets, and are gonna be parents. I'm just not sure when it will feel real! God is good.

I've started looking at what types of things we'd might want for the nursery and that has been fun to go online "shopping." Hoping not to be overwhelmed once I go in-store to revise my master list. Prayers will be appreciated. (only half kidding...)

I'm really looking forward to meeting whoever is growing inside me. First, I'll settle for finding out if it's a boy or girl. Only a few more weeks until we find out! This does put a temporary damper on planning purposes. Then, I'd like to be sure I've felt him/her move in there. Pretty sure I've felt it, but it's a real bummer when you can't tell the difference between your unborn and digestion.

All sarcasm aside, thanks to everyone who is feeling joy with us. It's been a real blessing to know others are sharing in our excitement! :)

We're having a baby. Whoa.

I suppose this is more like two seperate blog entries, but it seemed fitting to keep them together. We've recently found out and announced that around April 8, 2013, we're going to be parents! What??? Yeah. It's pretty awesome. I'm now 12 weeks, was blessed to only be exhausted and have no appetite, and we saw/heard the heartbeat. What a cool experience. There's a beautiful side to all of this, and an interesting side that I didn't know to expect. The interesting part started to manifest itself once we told people. (Read below for all of that.) The beautiful side is exactly as we imagined. We already love this little baby, we love eachother, and our family is expanding in both love and size. I get weekly email updates reminding us what size the baby is this week and how it's developed over the last week. (It's a lime right now!) God's intricate creation is happening inside me right now. It's unbelievable. What do you mean it's the size of a lime, and already has fingernails?! It's made me think twice as hard about the value of life and how quick people are to dismiss a pregnancy. God is good to give us such a gift.


***This part is really not meant for the masses. We know so many people that love and adore their children. All parents are of course entitled to vent, be exhausted and have a break. I suppose this is more for the people that choose negativity over positivity while raising their children. Read on if you would like.

Let me start with something I'll never forget. There was a family I watched recently while I was waiting to get a haircut. She had 3 sweet kids with her, all well-behaved and relatively quiet for young children. She was upset with them for no reason, like they were bugging her just by being there. You could tell how broken their little spirits were, and it made me want to cry. I suppose it was because of this that reminded me of people who can't look past the burden of parenthood...thus producing this rant and going hand-in-hand with a few comments made to me about becoming a mom.

"Our new chapter" is the best way I can refer to the newest development in our lives. It doesn't convey negativity or unreasonable expectations. It just conveys a continuation of our journey. Are we freaking thrilled?? Heck, yes. :) We are going in with an open mind!

 Since we've announced our pregnancy, I've received a myriad of reactions, such as those below (Pardon the sarcasm about to ensue. Perhaps it's my RAGING hormones. Ok, not really.)

- ::cackling laughter from a coworker I barely know:: then he said, "Just you wait until that thing comes out. EVERYTHING will change." (To which I replied in thought, "No, really. Perhaps, that's why we chose to wait 7 years into our marriage. Plus, that's just rude.")

- "Are you excited?" (This one should be a given. We're married, have stability, and I'm not a teenage drug addict. Of course, we're excited!)

- "Congratulations, you two will make great parents!" (Why thank you! We love that most people are excited for us. We feel prepared in the sense that we can find strength and wisdom in the Lord. And He is the best parent, can I get an AMEN?)

The best one I keep hearing is, "Just wait until you have kids!" So, is this supposed to be some kind of sage wisdom?? I don't really get it. Apparently, all of our time, money, and sanity will be lost on this new creature. Oh boy, we can't wait.

Instead, I would like to focus on the good of having a child. God is blessing us! We both realize what a cherished gift this is. If I'm not mistaken, Psalm 127:3 says, "Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him." Cool. Let's focus on that! We get to train this kid in the way he/she should go! I get to do my daughter's hair, or help my son look for bugs. Parenthood is going to be epic!

I'm sure some sleep deprived parents might feel like I'm coming from a place of ignorance because I haven't been there. But, we have seen many friends and family members go through the ups and downs of parenthood, so we feel like we have at least a 1/1000th of an idea of how hard it might be. It simply saddens to me to hear parents talk about their children like they're a burden. Plenty of people out there wish they could have that burden, with sleepless nights and all.... We're praying God will provide us the patience, energy, and excitement to do right by this little lime. Thankful we have him to lean on.